Kirjahaku

Born and raised on the low end of Chicago's south side, I was a young boy with a dream of becoming an artist. Little did I know, my life would become a living hell. The struggle with an alcoholic father and codependent mother destroyed my chance for success. I became a member of a notorious street gang, and the madness began. As I am trapped inside a world of make-believe love, trial and tribulation sends me falling to my knees in desperate hope of finding peace.

Born and raised on the low end of Chicago's south side, I was a young boy with a dream of becoming an artist. Little did I know, my life would become a living hell. The struggle with an alcoholic father and codependent mother destroyed my chance for success. I became a member of a notorious street gang, and the madness began. As I am trapped inside a world of make-believe love, trial and tribulation sends me falling to my knees in desperate hope of finding peace.

I was nineteen years old when I met the demon for the first time. The cunning and baffling of its character defects captivated me, and held me hostage for years. I became an addict whose life spiraled outta control It was a monster, cleverly camouflaged in a puff of smoke I called, "the devil's love potion." Trapped in a world of crushed dreams, false hope, and unmanageability, I was weakened and defeated by the intrusion of my new best friend. Blinded by the realities of my addition, I hit bottom over and over again. I had gone completely insane, and at the brink of suicide, when a final cry to God brought me back from hell.

I was nineteen years old when I met the demon for the first time. The cunning and baffling of its character defects captivated me, and held me hostage for years. I became an addict whose life spiraled outta control It was a monster, cleverly camouflaged in a puff of smoke I called, "the devil's love potion." Trapped in a world of crushed dreams, false hope, and unmanageability, I was weakened and defeated by the intrusion of my new best friend. Blinded by the realities of my addition, I hit bottom over and over again. I had gone completely insane, and at the brink of suicide, when a final cry to God brought me back from hell.

EPILOGUE Mental madness, misery, guilt, physical neglect; it all came like a whirlwind as I crawled around in the darkness, searching for my sanity. I had barricaded myself in the cold bedroom of the condemned building. The demons danced on the surface of mind, bringing with them the illusion of peace in a small rock that my body craved for. It was hell dressed like heaven at the end of my glass pipe. It promised to rescue me from all that tormented me, while reality slipped away at the strike of my lighter. It seemed that not even God could save me from the bottom in which I was headed. It was my turn to wrestle with the prince of darkness, and his appointed legions of entities. My faith had been bottled up and sealed shut, leaving my soul stained in the pits of HELL

EPILOGUE Mental madness, misery, guilt, physical neglect; it all came like a whirlwind as I crawled around in the darkness, searching for my sanity. I had barricaded myself in the cold bedroom of the condemned building. The demons danced on the surface of mind, bringing with them the illusion of peace in a small rock that my body craved for. It was hell dressed like heaven at the end of my glass pipe. It promised to rescue me from all that tormented me, while reality slipped away at the strike of my lighter. It seemed that not even God could save me from the bottom in which I was headed. It was my turn to wrestle with the prince of darkness, and his appointed legions of entities. My faith had been bottled up and sealed shut, leaving my soul stained in the pits of HELL

Dishonesty, deceit, betrayal, resentment, and envy all played a part in my self-destructive life.The path in front of me was littered with unwanted emotions. I fought my inner man constantlyagainst the truth. The surface of my life seemed normal to the onlooking eye, but the reality ofwho I really was and what I'd been taught to be, was anything but normal. It was a rollercoasterof confusion and false hope planted and harvested by the woman I placed above God Himself, my mother, She was the driven force of whom I wanted to please.But, the darkness in her told a different story of who she was. It would be years before the veilthat covered her deceitfulness showed itself. Her promises reeled me in, and her trust blindedme from the destruction waiting in the distance. I knew nothing, nor was I told anything aboutthe parents that had been chosen for me. I had but one alternative, to turn to the man in my life, my father. But little did I know, his role in my life was as devastating as my mother's. He wasthe absolute secret, and the reality of who he was would one day test my love for him.

Dishonesty, deceit, betrayal, resentment, and envy all played a part in my self-destructive life.The path in front of me was littered with unwanted emotions. I fought my inner man constantlyagainst the truth. The surface of my life seemed normal to the onlooking eye, but the reality ofwho I really was and what I'd been taught to be, was anything but normal. It was a rollercoasterof confusion and false hope planted and harvested by the woman I placed above God Himself, my mother, She was the driven force of whom I wanted to please.But, the darkness in her told a different story of who she was. It would be years before the veilthat covered her deceitfulness showed itself. Her promises reeled me in, and her trust blindedme from the destruction waiting in the distance. I knew nothing, nor was I told anything aboutthe parents that had been chosen for me. I had but one alternative, to turn to the man in my life, my father. But little did I know, his role in my life was as devastating as my mother's. He wasthe absolute secret, and the reality of who he was would one day test my love for him.