My journey began in the wee morning hours of February 18, 2007. At the time my husband and I were living in Los Angeles, in the beautiful home we had just purchased five short months before, in a quiet suburb west of the city. That very early February morning my husband was traveling home from a recording session in Hollywood, along the same route he took every day, around the same time he traveled everyday. Only this time, unbeknownst to him, a young man who had been out celebrating his birthday that evening with friends was driving intoxicated (nearly twice the legal limit) on that same stretch of highway. After driving for a while west-bound on the 101 Hollywood freeway, the young man inexplicably pulled over to the right shoulder, paused momentarily, and in a decision that would change many lives forever, proceeded to make a u-turn and head the wrong way - traveling full speed - into opposing traffic. There are some things in life that are simply unimaginable. Most would put losing your 30 year old husband in an instant on that list of very unimaginable things. However, losing a spouse at any age is a devastating and difficult ordeal that leads to an often devastating and difficult (and sometimes unbearably long) journey. How we get through that ordeal, and the journey that follows, is about as unique to each one of us as our fingerprints. Along with screaming in the car while sitting in traffic, throwing things, and binge shopping (a subject for another book entirely), the thing that I found most cathartic was to write. This book is a collection of selected stories from my original blog "Changing Lanes", which I wrote in the months and years following my husband's death. Back in 2007, when I first began this journey, there was no way in the world I would have believed that I would not only survive the death of my husband, but that I would find myself moving on from a career that I adored and worked hard to succeed in, sell the home that we bought together in which we intended to raise our family, and move 2,000 miles away to an entirely new city in the hopes of getting a fresh start. The ways in which my life has changed are many, some of those changes are quite profound, and completely unexpected. I have found that it really is amazing what we can do when we decide that though something awful has occurred, we have not yet reached the end of our story. A glimpse into one young widow's experience with grief in real time, I selected these particular stories so that you - the reader, who may have found yourself in a world of loss and grief that you never fathomed - could discover a sense of connection to another who has walked a while in similar shoes, but - most importantly - my hope is that you would find in these posts a sense of hope as you witness my struggles, epiphanies, resolution, toward my evolution.
