Craig Brown

An awful lot has happened since that bright, fateful May morning in 1997 when New Labour swept to power. Things, we were told, Could Only Get Better. Instead, things took a turn for the worse...To console Tony Blair as he embarks on his long, grinning journey into oblivion, Craig Brown has packed a special time-capsule of Britain during the Tony Years: from Cool Britannia to ASBOs and from Posh and Becks to Charles and Camilla, the nation's funniest satirist makes sense - and nonsense - of it all.

Craig Brown (no not the Scottish football manager) is the funniest, the most revered and the most prolific humorist we have. This book collects together for the first time the best of his wit from the vast archive of his work spanning the last twenty years, teaming it with brand new material. This collection of parody, satire, whimsy and wit, includes extracts and articles from Private Eye, The Daily Telegraph, The Guardian, The Independent, Vanity Fair, The Mail on Sunday, The Spectator and many more. They capture the essence of British life - he is as funny on soaps, Posh Spice and Tony Blackburn as he is on Art and Politics.

A BEST BOOK OF THE YEARThe Telegraph (Top 10) - The Washington Post - The Guardian - The Times (London) Independent (London) - Vox - New Statesman Virginia Woolf compared her to a caterpillar; Anne Frank kept pictures of her on the wall of the Secret Annex; Jimi Hendrix played her tune; Haile Selassie gave her a gold tiara; Dirk Bogarde watched Death in Venice with her; Andy Warhol envied her fame; Donald Trump offended her; E. M. Forster confessed he would have married her, if only she had been a boy. Queen Elizabeth II was famous for longer than anyone who has ever lived. When people spoke of her, they spoke of themselves; when they dreamed of her, they dreamed of themselves. She mirrored their hopes and anxieties. To the optimist, she seemed an optimist; to the pessimist, a pessimist; to the awestruck, charismatic; and to the cynical, humdrum. Though by nature reserved and unassuming, her presence in a room could make presidents, tycoons, and rock stars turn back into the nervous children they once were. For close to a century, she inhabited the psyche of the world. Combining biography, essay, cultural history, dream diary, travelog, and satire, Craig Brown--the bestselling and award-winning author of Ninety-Nine Glimpses of Princess Margaret and Hello Goodbye Hello--presents a kaleidoscopic portrait of this most public yet most private of sovereigns in Q: A Voyage Around the Queen.

THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER ?THE TIMES and SUNDAY TIMES BEST MEMOIR OF 2024 … 'GENIUS' A BOOK OF THE YEAR for theSPECTATOR, MAIL ON SUNDAY, NEW STATESMAN, FINANCIAL TIMES, INDEPENDENT, TELEGRAPH, SUNDAY EXPRESSand THE TABLET. From one of the funniest writers of our time, the award-winning author of One Two Three Four and Ma'am Darling turns his attention to Queen Elizabeth II in an unforgettable and fascinating biography. 'A crown jewel among royal biographies' OBSERVER ‘Extraordinarily original, enlightening and fresh’ SPECTATOR 'Absolutely fascinating' Ruth Langsford, LOOSE WOMEN 'A very unusual masterpiece' SUNDAY TELEGRAPH 'Brilliantly funny and well-researched' FINANCIAL TIMES Virginia Woolf compared her to a caterpillar; Anne Frank kept pictures of her on the wall of her annex; Jimi Hendrix played her tune; Haile Selassie gave her a gold tiara; Dirk Bogarde watched Death in Venice with her; Andy Warhol envied her fame; Donald Trump offended her; E.M. Forster confessed he would have married her, if only she had been a boy. Queen Elizabeth II was famous for longer than anyone who has ever lived. When people spoke of her, they spoke of themselves; when they dreamed of her, they dreamed of themselves. She mirrored their hopes and anxieties. To the optimist, she seemed an optimist; to the pessimist, a pessimist; to the awestruck, charismatic; and to the cynical, humdrum. Though by nature reserved and unassuming, her presence could fill presidents and rock gods with terror. For close to a century, she inhabited the psyche of a nation. Combining biography, essays, cultural history, dream diaries, travelogue and satire, the bestselling and award-winning author of Ma'am Darling and One Two Three Four: The Beatles in Time presents a kaleidoscopic portrait of this most public yet private of sovereigns. – 'An unconventional tribute that offers a snapshot of almost a century of social history with a mix of royal insanity, and superior anecdotes, from farts and corgis to Paul McCartney and poets laureate' THE TIMES and SUNDAY TIMES BOOKS OF THE YEAR 2024 'An enthralling reverie on memory, identity, coincidence and meaning – testing, teasing, charming, moving and deceptively wise' RORY STEWART ‘An entertaining and revealing digest … fascinating … Craig Brown has captured something essential about Britain’s curious relationship with royalty’TLS 'Completely and utterly brilliant and exquisitely funny and fascinating. This book is, dare I say, majestic. Craig Brown has no peers – I would curtsey to him if I met him' MARINA HYDE 'Wonderfully readable … At once sympathetic but clear-eyed, kind but sharp' NEW STATESMAN 'Brown is as sharp and dryly funny as his subject'EVENING STANDARD 'You wouldn’t think the world needed another book about Queen Elizabeth – but how wrong you’d be. Craig Brown’s wholly original and enthralling biography is absolute heaven from start to finish’ INDIA KNIGHT 'Craig Brown continues to reinvent the art of biography… utterly fascinating' JASON COWLEY Craig Brown's book One Two Three Four won the Baillie Gifford Prize for Non-Fiction in 2020.

Some people want to take their secrets to the grave. On the Briscola coach to Albuquerque, that's just not possible."All manner of people ride a Briscola coach. Some travel toward dreams, others are escaping horrors, each carries their secrets and the belief that they harbour truths known only to themselves."A Little Something To Hide is an exploration of the human condition. Every traveller on the Briscola Coach Service believes they're harbouring a secret that none of the world can see.Some secrets are darker than others and none of them are truly hidden. Climb aboard to learn more and remember, never trust the person you're next to, no matter how sweet they look.

THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER?THE TIMES and SUNDAY TIMES BEST MEMOIR OF 2024 ... 'GENIUS'A BOOK OF THE YEAR for theSPECTATOR, MAIL ON SUNDAY, NEW STATESMAN, FINANCIAL TIMES, INDEPENDENT, TELEGRAPH, SUNDAY EXPRESSand THE TABLET.

THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER ?THE TIMES and SUNDAY TIMES BEST MEMOIR OF 2024 … 'GENIUS' A BOOK OF THE YEAR for theSPECTATOR, MAIL ON SUNDAY, NEW STATESMAN, FINANCIAL TIMES, INDEPENDENT, TELEGRAPH, SUNDAY EXPRESSand THE TABLET. From one of the funniest writers of our time, the award-winning author of One Two Three Four and Ma'am Darling turns his attention to Queen Elizabeth II in an unforgettable and fascinating biography. 'A crown jewel among royal biographies' OBSERVER ‘Extraordinarily original, enlightening and fresh’ SPECTATOR 'Absolutely fascinating' Ruth Langsford, LOOSE WOMEN 'A very unusual masterpiece' SUNDAY TELEGRAPH 'Brilliantly funny and well-researched' FINANCIAL TIMES Virginia Woolf compared her to a caterpillar; Anne Frank kept pictures of her on the wall of her annex; Jimi Hendrix played her tune; Haile Selassie gave her a gold tiara; Dirk Bogarde watched Death in Venice with her; Andy Warhol envied her fame; Donald Trump offended her; E.M. Forster confessed he would have married her, if only she had been a boy. Queen Elizabeth II was famous for longer than anyone who has ever lived. When people spoke of her, they spoke of themselves; when they dreamed of her, they dreamed of themselves. She mirrored their hopes and anxieties. To the optimist, she seemed an optimist; to the pessimist, a pessimist; to the awestruck, charismatic; and to the cynical, humdrum. Though by nature reserved and unassuming, her presence could fill presidents and rock gods with terror. For close to a century, she inhabited the psyche of a nation. Combining biography, essays, cultural history, dream diaries, travelogue and satire, the bestselling and award-winning author of Ma'am Darling and One Two Three Four: The Beatles in Time presents a kaleidoscopic portrait of this most public yet private of sovereigns. – 'An unconventional tribute that offers a snapshot of almost a century of social history with a mix of royal insanity, and superior anecdotes, from farts and corgis to Paul McCartney and poets laureate' THE TIMES and SUNDAY TIMES BOOKS OF THE YEAR 2024 'An enthralling reverie on memory, identity, coincidence and meaning – testing, teasing, charming, moving and deceptively wise' RORY STEWART ‘An entertaining and revealing digest … fascinating … Craig Brown has captured something essential about Britain’s curious relationship with royalty’TLS 'Completely and utterly brilliant and exquisitely funny and fascinating. This book is, dare I say, majestic. Craig Brown has no peers – I would curtsey to him if I met him' MARINA HYDE 'Wonderfully readable … At once sympathetic but clear-eyed, kind but sharp' NEW STATESMAN 'Brown is as sharp and dryly funny as his subject'EVENING STANDARD 'You wouldn’t think the world needed another book about Queen Elizabeth – but how wrong you’d be. Craig Brown’s wholly original and enthralling biography is absolute heaven from start to finish’ INDIA KNIGHT 'Craig Brown continues to reinvent the art of biography… utterly fascinating' JASON COWLEY Craig Brown's book One Two Three Four won the Baillie Gifford Prize for Non-Fiction in 2020.

‘Our greatest living satirist’ Sunday Times ‘The most screamingly funny living writer’ Mail on Sunday From the bestselling and award-winning author of Ma'am Darling and One Two Three Four, a selection of Craig Brown's finest writing collected together for the first time. Haywire presents a survival guide to the 21st century. The acclaimed biographer of Princess Margaret and The Beatles considers such diverse topics as gloves, outer space, the Marx Brothers, Richard Dawkins, Hitler’s hair, John Stonehouse, Katie Price, tongue-twisters, Bruce Springsteen, Harry and Meghan, Stanley Spencer, Brian Epstein, Downton Abbey, Sigmund Freud and Karl Lagerfeld’s cat. With the full battery of the humourist's armoury – clerihews, tongue twisters, whimsy, parody, farce, satire, social observation, nonsense – Brown skewers the fads and delusions of the contemporary world.

'The most screamingly funny living writer' Barry Humphries, Mail on SundayFrom the bestselling and award-winning author of Ma'am Darling and One Two Three Four, a selection of Craig Brown's finest writing collected together for the first time.

'The most screamingly funny living writer' Barry Humphries, Mail on Sunday From the bestselling and award-winning author of Ma'am Darling and One Two Three Four, a selection of Craig Brown's finest writing collected together for the first time. What is James Bond's middle name? How does Jacob Rees-Mogg's nanny set about cleaning him up in the morning? When did Piers Morgan introduce his special guest Kim Jong-Un as “the straight-talking boy from North Korea who grew up to become a global superstar”? All these important questions, and a great many more, are answered in Craig Brown's Haywire. Featuring handy household tips from Mary Berry (‘When eating a boiled egg be careful to remove the shell first, or it can be a little crunchy’) and historic admissions from Queen Elizabeth 1st to Oprah Winfrey concerning her mother's beheading (‘Thank you for having the courage to share that with us’), Haywire presents a survival guide to the 21st century. In one chapter, Brown writes about the influence of Blackpool on Sigmund Freud and Les Dawson. In another, he unearths the Historical Online Archive and discovers that the invention of the wheel in Mesopotamia in 4000 BC drew fierce criticism on social media. “My mate tried it, says it's total rubbish” wrote Brian from Sumeria. The acclaimed biographer of Princess Margaret and The Beatles delivers essays on such diverse figures as Ronald Searle, John Stonehouse, Bruce Springsteen, Richard Dawkins, Katie Price, Stanley Spencer, Harry and Meghan, Brian Epstein, Kenneth Williams, Ronald Reagan, Simon Dee and the Marx Brothers. With the full battery of the humourist's armoury – clerihews, tongue-twisters, whimsy, parody, farce, satire, social observation, nonsense – Brown skewers the passing fads and delusions of the contemporary world. ‘Our greatest living satirist’ Sunday Times ‘Exquisitely naughty and hilarious’ Guardian ‘Craig Brown’s humour will outlive his victims … his journalism is one of the few compensations for being British now’ Sunday Telegraph

Winner of the 2020 Baillie Gifford Prize for Non-Fiction A distinctive portrait of the Fab Four by one of the sharpest and wittiest writers of our time"If you want to know what it was like to live those extraordinary Beatles years in real time, read this book." --Alan Johnson, The Spectator Though fifty years have passed since the breakup of the Beatles, the Fab Four continue to occupy an utterly unique place in popular culture. Their influence extends far beyond music and into realms as diverse as fashion and fine art, sexual politics and religion. When they appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1964, fresh off the plane from England, they provoked an epidemic of hoarse-throated fandom that continues to this day. Who better, then, to capture the Beatles phenomenon than Craig Brown--the inimitable author of Ninety-Nine Glimpses of Princess Margaret and master chronicler of the foibles and foppishness of British high society? This wide-ranging portrait of the four lads from Liverpool rivals the unique spectacle of the band itself by delving into a vast catalog of heretofore unexamined lore. When actress Eleanor Bron touched down at Heathrow with the Beatles, she thought that a flock of starlings had alighted on the roof of the terminal--only to discover that the birds were in fact young women screaming at the top of their lungs. One journalist, mistaken for Paul McCartney as he trailed the band in his car, found himself nearly crushed to death as fans climbed atop the vehicle and pressed their bodies against the windshield. Or what about the Baptist preacher who claimed that the Beatles synchronized their songs with the rhythm of an infant's heartbeat so as to induce a hypnotic state in listeners? And just how many people have employed the services of a Canadian dentist who bought John Lennon's tooth at auction, extracted its DNA, and now offers paternity tests to those hoping to sue his estate? 150 Glimpses of the Beatles is, above all, a distinctively kaleidoscopic examination of the Beatles' effect on the world around them and the world they helped bring into being. Part anthropology and part memoir, and enriched by the recollections of everyone from Tom Hanks to Bruce Springsteen, this book is a humorous, elegiac, and at times madcap take on the Beatles' role in the making of the sixties and of music as we know it.

Alla ville ha något av dem, alla hade en åsikt om dem. 50 år efter att medlemmarna gick skilda vägar fortsätter The Beatles att fascinera. Deras historia fick tidigt drag av mytologi, men Craig Brown visar att det går att ta sig an bandet på ett nytt sätt: hans prisade biografi är en underhållande mosaik av berättelser, scener, minnen och dokument som sammantaget ger en autentisk och originell bild av Beatles och deras epok, full av oväntade aha-upplevelser även för den trodde sig kunna sin Beatleslegend utan och innan.

SHORTLISTED for the Baillie Gifford Prize’s 25th Anniversary Winner of Winners award WINNER OF THE BAILLIE GIFFORD PRIZE 2020 A Spectator Book of the Year • A Times Book of the Year • A Telegraph Book of the Year • A Sunday Times Book of the Year From the award-winning author of Ma’am Darling: 99 Glimpses of Princess Margaret comes a fascinating, hilarious, kaleidoscopic biography of the Fab Four. John Updike compared them to ‘the sun coming out on an Easter morning’. Bob Dylan introduced them to drugs. The Duchess of Windsor adored them. Noel Coward despised them. JRR Tolkien snubbed them. The Rolling Stones copied them. Loenard Bernstein admired them. Muhammad Ali called them ‘little sissies’. Successive Prime Ministers sucked up to them. No one has remained unaffected by the music of The Beatles. As Queen Elizabeth II observed on her golden wedding anniversary, ‘Think what we would have missed if we had never heard The Beatles.’ One Two Three Four traces the chance fusion of the four key elements that made up The Beatles: fire (John), water (Paul), air (George) and earth (Ringo). It also tells the bizarre and often unfortunate tales of the disparate and colourful people within their orbit, among them Fred Lennon, Yoko Ono, the Maharishi, Aunt Mimi, Helen Shapiro, the con artist Magic Alex, Phil Spector, their psychedelic dentist John Riley and their failed nemesis, Det Sgt Norman Pilcher. From the bestselling author of Ma’am Darling comes a kaleidoscopic mixture of history, etymology, diaries, autobiography, fan letters, essays, parallel lives, party lists, charts, interviews, announcements and stories. One Two Three Four joyfully echoes the frenetic hurly-burly of an era.

Winner of the 2020 Baillie Gifford Prize for Non-Fiction A distinctive portrait of the Fab Four by one of the sharpest and wittiest writers of our time"If you want to know what it was like to live those extraordinary Beatles years in real time, read this book." --Alan Johnson, The Spectator Though fifty years have passed since the breakup of the Beatles, the fab four continue to occupy an utterly unique place in popular culture. Their influence extends far beyond music and into realms as diverse as fashion and fine art, sexual politics and religion. When they appeared on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1964, fresh off the plane from England, they provoked an epidemic of hoarse-throated fandom that continues to this day. Who better, then, to capture the Beatles phenomenon than Craig Brown--the inimitable author of Ninety-Nine Glimpses of Princess Margaret and master chronicler of the foibles and foppishness of British high society? This wide-ranging portrait of the four lads from Liverpool rivals the unique spectacle of the band itself by delving into a vast catalog of heretofore unexamined lore. When actress Eleanor Bron touched down at Heathrow with the Beatles, she thought that a flock of starlings had alighted on the roof of the terminal--only to discover that the birds were in fact young women screaming at the top of their lungs. One journalist, mistaken for Paul McCartney as he trailed the band in his car, found himself nearly crushed to death as fans climbed atop the vehicle and pressed their bodies against the windshield. Or what about the Baptist preacher who claimed that the Beatles synchronized their songs with the rhythm of an infant's heartbeat so as to induce a hypnotic state in listeners? And just how many people have employed the services of a Canadian dentist who bought John Lennon's tooth at auction, extracted its DNA, and now offers paternity tests to those hoping to sue his estate? 150 Glimpses of the Beatles is, above all, a distinctively kaleidoscopic examination of the Beatles' effect on the world around them and the world they helped bring into being. Part anthropology and part memoir, and enriched by the recollections of everyone from Tom Hanks to Bruce Springsteen, this book is a humorous, elegiac, and at times madcap take on the Beatles' role in the making of the sixties and of music as we know it.