Ian Allen

The follow-up to Ian Allen's uproarious Embarassing Dad Jokes, It's the Daddy takes the 'dad joke book' to an even greater extent!

The follow-up to Ian Allen’s uproarious Embarassing Dad Jokes, Even More Embarrassing DAD JOKES takes the ‘dad joke book’ to new dimensions! Even More Embarrassing DAD JOKES builds on the strength of Ian Allen’s original Embarrassing Dad Jokes book that has enjoyed regular strong sales in the US, UK and Australia. The chicken finally takes a break from crossing the road in this attractively packaged joke book, which majors on – among many other things – the beaver: What do you call a German beaver with an obsession for building dams on ladders? Götterdämmerung What’s a beaver’s least favourite film? The Dam Busters Packed with graphics and bursting with ideas, it is both funny and clever with winning punchlines on every page, from the grand master of the dad joke. What do you call a bear who leans on its paws? Pauline I wrote a great book on how to build a new staircase at home… It was a step-by-step guide. I met a woman who likes setting fire to banks. I said, ‘that’s a perfect job for you, Bernadette.’ Why do Badgers dislike Wimbledon so much? They hate going to five sets.

Staggering statistics, strange facts and all kinds of surprising stuff from the National Trust. Haunted houses, baffling objects, bizarre buildings and distinctly curious characters. • Who needs an upside-down lighthouse? • How can you tell a gargoyle from a hunky punk? • What are the top 10 historical toilets? • Where’s the best place to see a UFO? • Why would you hang toast on a tree? Welcome to this smorgasbord of strangely compelling facts and figures about the National Trust. Find out what lurks under the floorboards of its grandest homes and hides behind the shrubs in its gardens. Meet some of the curious characters who lived at its properties, and discover the unusual jobs carried out by its staff. Pit your wits against National Trust curators to identify the oddest things in their care. For secrets, surprises and strange things of all kinds, read on.

It's official: dads were put onto this planet to embarrass the rest of their families. This hilarious book is a spotter's guide to the innumerable ways Dad can achieve this, whether it's via ridiculous dancing, experimental facial hair, cringeworthy sportswear or putting his foot in it at funerals. Contains a wealth of highly useful information for the discerning dad, including countdowns of the most embarrassing things Dads say in wedding speeches, the fashion fads Dad really shouldn't have bothered with and the 10 signs that Dad is having a midlife crisis, plus a handy diagrammatic guide to dancing like a dad and Dad's guides to travel, cleaning, hobbies, oneupmanship and many things besides. With all this plus a liberal scattering of charts, lists and jokes and illustrated with action shots of dads doing the things they love to do, this book is ideal for the dad in your life, or for any unsuspecting man who's about to become one. Contains a wealth of highly useful information for the discerning dad, including countdowns of the most embarrassing things Dads say in wedding speeches, the fashion fads Dad really shouldn't have bothered with and the 10 signs that Dad is having a midlife crisis, plus a handy diagrammatic guide to dancing like a dad and Dad's guides to travel, cleaning, hobbies, oneupmanship and many things besides. With all this plus a liberal scattering of charts, lists and jokes and illustrated with action shots of dads doing the things they love to do, this book is ideal for the dad in your life, or for any unsuspecting man who's about to become one.

All the fun of Portico's bestselling Strangest series, now in quiz form!

What happened to the man with five legs? His trousers fit him like a glove. You can’t keep a good Dad joke down. At the Sunday lunch table, down the pub, at the workplace, dads all over the nation are still churning out the lamest, most pathetic jokes you’ve ever heard. And we’ve gathered them all in this book. Back by popular demand, The Very Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes 2 is an all-new collection of Dad joke favourites. With 1000 rib-tickling jokes for every occasion, this book makes it easier than ever to have a laugh – or, more likely, a groan – with Dad. Who drives round the West Country in a camper van? Tess of the Dormobiles. What do angry mice send one another in winter? Cross-mouse cards. Word count: 30,000

Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because he wasn't peeling very well! Proving the age-old maxim that ‘it’s in the way that you tell them’, Dads – for the best part of forever – have always been renowned for being truly god-awful joke tellers. Whether it’s telling them at the wrong moment, misremembering the punchline or it just simply being one of those jokes that were terrible to begin with, Dads are an embarrassment to the whole family when it comes to trying to tell jokes. The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes is full to the brim with jokes that only your dear old Dad would dare say – jokes that will make you groan, sigh … and then probably make you groan again. Dads take great pleasure in these kinds of jokes and some of them are so rubbish they actually blossom into proper rib-ticklers – but don’t tell your dad that, it’ll only encourage him!