Lemony Snicket

A brand-new book from the bestselling author of A Series of Unfortunate Events – a cautionary tale about his own demise. For curious children and adults alike. ‘Reading this little book feels like opening a window to let in air and light. It’s filled with curious information and powerful feelings, and is humorous, sad, meditative and rapturous by turns.’ Guardian ‘A strange, beguiling, beautiful book. No one else could have written it, or anything even a little like it. If Lemony Snicket didn’t exist, we’d have to invent him.’ Anthony McGowan, author of Lark For more than twenty years, Lemony Snicket has led millions of young readers through a mysterious world of bewildering questions and unfortunate events. With this latest book – a love letter to readers young and old about the vagaries of real life – long-time fans and new readers alike will experience Snicket’s distinctive voice in a new way. This true story – as true as Lemony Snicket himself – begins with a puzzling note under his door: You had poison for breakfast. Following a winding trail of clues to solve the mystery of his own demise, Snicket takes us on a thought-provoking tour of his predilections...

This tenth installment in the delightfully disheartening series finds the ill-fated Baudelaire orphans confronted by snow gnats, uninvited guests, a wickedly devious villain, a hidden lair, and some hazardous exploits that are not for the faint of heart. 1 million first printing.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESDon't be fooled by the new, Netflix-inspired book covers of the second five books in this New York Times bestselling series.The events recounted in this five-book box set (which includes The Austere Academy, The Ersatz Elevator, The Vile Village, The Hostile Hospital, and The Carnivorous Carnival) are sure to depress you. If you cannot stomach stories that find misfortune continuously befalling the three charming Baudelaire orphans, I recommend you make another reading selection.Some boxes should never be opened.

In the tradition of great storytellers, from Dickens to Dahl, comes an exquisitely dark comedy that is both literary and irreverent, hilarious and deftly crafted. Never before has a tale of three likeable and unfortunate children been quite so enchanting, or quite so uproariously unhappy.Are you made fainthearted by death? Does fire unnerve you? Is a villain something that might crop up in future nightmares of yours? Are you thrilled by nefarious plots? Is cold porridge upsetting to you? Vicious threats? Hooks? Uncomfortable clothing?It is likely that your answers will reveal A Series of Unfortunate Events to be ill-suited for your personal use. A librarian, bookseller, or acquaintance should be able to suggest books more appropriate for your fragile temperament. But to the rarest of readers we say, "Proceed, but cautiously."

A brand-new book from the bestselling author of A Series of Unfortunate Events – a cautionary tale about his own demise. For curious children and adults alike. ‘Reading this little book feels like opening a window to let in air and light. It’s filled with curious information and powerful feelings, and is humorous, sad, meditative and rapturous by turns.’ Guardian ‘A strange, beguiling, beautiful book. No one else could have written it, or anything even a little like it. If Lemony Snicket didn’t exist, we’d have to invent him.’ Anthony McGowan, author of Lark For more than twenty years, Lemony Snicket has led millions of young readers through a mysterious world of bewildering questions and unfortunate events. With this latest book – a love letter to readers young and old about the vagaries of real life – long-time fans and new readers alike will experience Snicket’s distinctive voice in a new way. This true story – as true as Lemony Snicket himself – begins with a puzzling note under his door: You had poison for breakfast. Following a winding trail of clues to solve the mystery of his own demise, Snicket takes us on a thought-provoking tour of his predilections...

In the years since this publishing house was founded, we have worked with an array of wondrous authors who have brought illuminating clarity to our bewildering world. Now, instead, we bring you Lemony Snicket.Over the course of his long and suspicious career, Mr. Snicket has investigated many things, including villainy, treachery, conspiracy, ennui, and various suspicious fires. In this book, he is investigating his own death.Poison for Breakfast is a different sort of book than others we have published, and from others you may have read. It is different from other books Mr. Snicket has written. It could be said to be a book of philosophy, something almost no one likes, but it is also a mystery, and many people claim to like those. Certainly Mr. Snicket didn't relish the dreadful task of solving it, but he had no choice. It was put in front of him, right there, on his plate.

Lemony Snicket’s The Bad Beginning is the first book in the globally bestselling series A Series of Unfortunate Events. This exclusive gold foiled 20th anniversary hardback gift edition commemorates the miserable fact that every child in the world has wanted this brilliantly funny book for twenty years. Perfect for fans of Roald Dahl and Mr Gum, young readers of 9 to 11 will adore the mischievously dark humour. Lemony Snicket’s 'A Series of Unfortunate Events’ has been made into a blockbuster Hollywood film starring Jim Carrey and is also a hit Netflix TV series. Now with new anniversary blurb by the mysterious author himself. Dear Reader, For the past twenty years, my books have been upsetting the countless readers who have been foolish enough to begin to read them. The three Baudelaire siblings and their lives of misery and woe have now been responsible for more than two decades of weeping. From the very first page of this book, when the children are at the beach and receive terrible news, to the last page, when something goes wrong at the worst possible moment, disaster strikes Violet, Klaus and Sunny wherever they go. In this short book alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, and cold porridge for breakfast. I have spent the last twenty years writing down these unpleasant details so that they might be available to the general public, but there is nothing stopping the general public, or you, from putting this book down at once and reading something less upsetting, if you prefer that sort of thing. With all due respect,Lemony Snicket Are you unlucky enough to own all 13 adventures? The Bad BeginningThe Reptile RoomThe Wide WindowThe Miserable MillThe Austere AcademyThe Ersatz ElevatorThe Vile VillageThe Hostile HospitalThe Carnivorous CarnivalThe Slippery SlopeThe Grim GrottoThe Penultimate PerilThe End And what about All the Wrong Questions? In this four-book series a 13-year-old Lemony chronicles his dangerous and puzzling apprenticeship in a mysterious organisation that nobody knows anything about: ‘Who Could That Be at This Hour?’‘When Did you Last See Her?’‘Shouldn’t You Be in School?’‘Why is This Night Different from All Other Nights?’

It can feel good to be angry. It can feel better to stop. Swarm of Bees! Swarm of Bees! You are SO angry! What will you do? Watch out! A mischievous boy has unleashed an angry swarm of bees! The result is a zany gallop through a charming town where readers will encounter evidence of some bad behaviour, some frenzied anger and thankfully, a hug and some spaghetti. From best-loved children's author Lemony Snicket and the supremely talented illustrator Rilla Alexander.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESIn the tradition of great storytellers, from Dickens to Dahl, comes an exquisitely dark comedy that is both literary and irreverent, hilarious and deftly crafted. Never before has a tale of three likeable and unfortunate children been quite so enchanting, or quite so uproariously unhappy. Are you made fainthearted by death? Does fire unnerve you? Is a villain something that might crop up in future nightmares of yours? Are you thrilled by nefarious plots? Is cold porridge upsetting to you? Vicious threats? Hooks? Uncomfortable clothing?It is likely that your answers will reveal A Series of Unfortunate Events to be ill-suited for your personal use. A librarian, bookseller, or acquaintance should be able to suggest books more appropriate for your fragile temperament. But to the rarest of readers we say, "Proceed, but cautiously."

A MULTI-VOICE RECORDING OF AN UPSETTING BOOK, NOW ON VINYL.Features a transparent sea foam green record and full-length digital download of the A Series of Unfortunate Events: The Bad Beginning audiobook.Like a car alarm, bagpipe music, or a doorbell ringing in the middle of the night, listening to The Bad Beginning will only upset you. This unique multi-voice recording brings the first book in Lemony Snicket's alarming A Series of Unfortunate Events to such terrible life that no one should really have to experience it. Unless you have an ear for such ghastly details as a tragic fire, a nefarious villain, itchy clothing, and cold porridge for breakfast, all narrated in chilly detail by the distinguished, and disturbed, Tim Curry with a team of talented readers, you would be better off listening to something else.CastViolet/Sunny: Tara SandsKlaus: Mitchell FederanMr. Poe: Dick RodsteinMrs. Poe: Maggie AlbrightCount Olaf: L.J. GanserBald Man: Oliver WymanJustice Strauss: Carolee Goodgold Narrator: Tim Curry

It can feel good to be angry. It can feel better to stop. Swarm of Bees! Swarm of Bees! You are SO angry! What will you do? Watch out! A mischievous boy has unleashed an angry swarm of bees! The result is a zany gallop through a charming town where readers will encounter evidence of some bad behaviour, some frenzied anger and thankfully, a hug and some spaghetti. From best-loved children's author Lemony Snicket and the supremely talented illustrator Rilla Alexander.

Looking for wit, wisdom, and inspiration all within the pages of one useful book? Read Something Else. Life is a turbulent journey, fraught with confusion, heartbreak, and inconvenience. This collection of wit and wisdom from New York Times bestselling author Lemony Snicket is unlikely to help.It includes a new introduction filled with curious aphorisms, a handful of never-before-seen-or-heard quotations, and fan favorites from works over the years. These dubious offerings, collected from Snicket’s books, unpublished papers, and more, have been made pleasing to the eye by illustrations, select fan art, and design flourishes.

★ "A witty, thought-provoking triumph."--Kirkus Reviews, starred review From the bestselling author of A Series of Unfortunate Events comes a brilliantly illustrated picture book that takes on big emotions in a rollicking, kid-friendly way. Whether you're a kid or a bee, sometimes you feel so mad, you buzz around looking for people to sting and trouble to make. See how one boy, a swarm of bees, and a whole town can get riled up and then find a way to feel better through the comfort of unconditional love and community. Printed in a brilliant palette of primary colors, brimming with beautiful dots and stripes, Rilla Alexander's art sings. Not since David Shannon's No, David have readers been given the pleasure of witnessing such uproariously terrible behavior, unbridled emotion, and ultimately, such comfort. "A buzzworthy book that tackles an often negated feeling in a bold new way." --School Library Journal

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESLike an off-key violin concert, the Roman Empire, or food poisoning, all things must come to an end. Thankfully, this includes A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket. The thirteenth and final installment in the groundbreaking series will answer readers' most burning questions: Will Count Olaf prevail? Will the Baudelaires survive? Will the series end happily? If there's nothing out there, what was that noise? Then again, why trouble yourself with unfortunate resolutions? Avoid the thirteenth and final book of Lemony Snicket's international bestselling series and you'll never have to know what happens.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESWarning: Your day will become very dark--and possibly damp--if you read this book.Plan to spend this spring in hiding. Lemony Snicket is back with the eleventh book in his New York Times bestselling A Series of Unfortunate Events.Lemony Snicket's saga about the charming, intelligent and grossly unlucky Baudelaire orphans continues to provoke suspicion and despair in readers the world over. In the eleventh and most alarming volume yet in the bestselling phenomenon A Series of Unfortunate Events, the intrepid siblings delve further into the dark mystery surrounding the death of their parents and the baffling VFD organisation.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESEverybody loves a carnival Who can fail to delight in the colourful people, the unworldly spectacle, the fabulous freaks?A carnival is a place for good family fun--as long as one has a family, that is. For the Baudelaire orphans, their time at the carnival turns out to be yet another episode in a now unbearable series of unfortunate events. In fact, in this appalling ninth installment in Lemony Snicket's serial, the siblings must confront a terrible lie, a caravan, and Chabo the wolf baby.With millions of readers worldwide, and the Baudelaire's fate turning from unpleasant to unseemly, it is clear that Lemony Snicket has taken nearly all the fun out of children's books.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESThe Baudelaires need a safe place to stay--somewhere far away from terrible villains and local police. A quiet refuge where misfortune never visits. Might Heimlich Hospital be just the place?In Lemony Snicket's eighth ghastly installment in A Series of Unfortunate Events, I'm sorry to say that the Baudelaire orphans will spend time in a hospital where they risk encountering a misleading newspaper headline, unnecessary surgery, an intercom system, anesthesia, heart-shaped balloons, and some very startling news about a fire.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESDear Reader, You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake, so please put it down. Nobody in their right mind would read this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages.I can think of no single reason why anyone would want to open a book containing such unpleasant matters as migrating crows, an angry mob, a newspaper headline, the arrest of innocent people, the Deluxe Cell, and some very strange hats. It is my solemn and sacred occupation to research each detail of the Baudelaire children's lives and write them all down, but you may prefer to do some other solemn and sacred thing, such as reading another book instead.With all due respect, Lemony Snicket

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESAs the three Baudelaire orphans warily approach their new home Prufrock Preparatory School, they can't help but notice the enormous stone arch bearing the school's motto Memento Mori or "Remember you will die."This is not a cheerful greeting and certainly marks an inauspicious beginning to a very bleak story just as we have come to expect from Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events, the deliciously morbid set of books that began with The Bad Beginning and only got worse.

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESIn their most daring misadventure, the Baudelaire orphans are adopted by very, very rich people, whose penthouse apartment is located mysteriously close to the place where all their misfortune began. Even though their new home in the city is fancy, and the children are clever and charming, I'm sorry to say that still, the unlucky orphans will encounter more disaster and woe.In fact, in this sixth book in A Series of Unfortunate Events, the children will experience a darkened staircase, a red herring, an auction, parsley soda, some friends in a dire situation, a secret passageway, and pinstripe suits.Both literary and irreverent, hilarious and deftly crafted, A Series of Unfortunate Events offers an exquisitely dark comedy in the tradition of Edward Gorey and Roald Dahl. Lemon Snicket's uproariously unhappy books continue to win readers, despite all his warnings.