Les Carter

What do you do when a life storm hits?Life storms such as divorce, job loss, illness, financial problems, empty nest, midlife crisis, family fractures, etc. create a world of chaos and confusion and often lead to quiet isolation, depending on the nature of the challenge. In more ordinary situations, someone may feel stuck in a life rut and seek the courage to pursue a new hobby, interest, or job and they need confidence-building tools. Just as a literal storm wreaks havoc in our lives, life reality storms can cause emotional, physical, spiritual, and mental challenges. People often won’t talk about them and can retreat into unhealthy isolation at best, or at worse, dive into dangerous self-medicating behaviors or suicidal tendencies.In The Winds of Change, Julie Shannon shares her own story of reframing life, as well as real-life stories of many others who overcame the unexpected and who and what encouraged them in their journey. Practical, definitive steps will be learned to successfully move through life realities and into a confident and abundant life.

Are you one who likes to keep the peace even when it comes at a high emotional price for yourself? Do your attempts to resolve differences with a controller leave you feeling wrung out and discouraged? Do you sense that your best traits (goodness, kindness, cooperation) somehow become a disadvantage with an overbearing counterpart? These questions and many more are addressed in the book, When Pleasing You Is Killing Me. With decades of experience as a psychotherapist, Dr. Les Carter takes you inside his counseling office, inviting you to share in real life stories of people just like you who are trying to make sense of persistent, controlling demands from all sorts of controlling people. A major premise explained by Dr. Carter is that every person has a built-in inclination to be controlling, but as maturation happens, controlling behaviors diminish. People pleasers are naturally positioned to increase their maturity since they are already predisposed to being loving, kind, and respectful. But when they routinely butt heads with controlling counterparts, their maturation is stunted as they predictably get pulled into power forms of communication that include coercion, shaming, accusations, defensiveness, anger, suppression, and the like.In the book, Dr. Carter will recount how real life pleasers developed relationship boundaries by incorporating assertiveness skills, ceasing unnecessary defensiveness, and setting aside false guilt for inner trust. Readers will be inspired to set their own pace in life, as opposed to letting the controller call the shots.

A field guide to understanding and managing anger--what it is, where it comes from, and how to get it under control.Many people assume that anger is the emotion that leads to raised voices and violence, and this kind of explosive rage is certainly a reality. But there are many different types of anger, from the simmering to the shutting down. Most of us experience some form of anger or its effects. The good news is that anger can be controlled.Founded on thirteen faith-based steps designed to recognize and manage anger, The Anger Workbook is an interactive guide to transforming patterns and behaviors with the help of biblical principles and evidence-based treatment.Best-selling author and practicing counselor Les Carter, Ph.D. and author and Christian psychiatrist Frank Minirth, M.D. draw on their years of experience and expertise to demystify the problem of anger. Throughout this workbook, you will learn:How to identify situational anger in yourself or others as well as patterns of relating, thinking, and behaving that may lead to feelings of angerHow emotions like fear, loneliness, and inferiority create angerHow to uncover and eliminate myths that perpetuate anger such as, "Letting go of my anger means I am conceding defeat." Or "No one understand my unique problems."For parents: how to manage a child's angerAs we get to know and understand anger--whether it's our own or a loved one's--its management becomes far less daunting. Anger can be controlled.

Grace and Divorce, written by noted author and psychotherapist, Dr. Les Carter, provides sound theological thinking on divorce and wise and compassionate suggestions for reframing and deepening our understanding of this difficult and controversial topic. Using stories from his practice as a therapist, Dr. Carter offers healing to both those who divorce and those who know and love them. He explains that Jesus never intended us to be so fixed about right and wrong and so judgmental that we lose the ability to love those who do not meet His perfect standards. With kindness and love, he shows that the wonderful gift of God’s grace is the best way to respond to people facing this trying life challenge.

Those who are in the unenviable position of living or working with a narcissist have learned by sad trial and error that they are the only one in the relationship who can change the dynamic. Certainly narcissists don’t think they need to change. Enough About You, Let’s Talk About Me is a hands-on resource for helping colleagues, families, and spouses deal with people who exhibit narcissistic tendencies by learning how to change their own attitudes and responses.

It's easy to identify rage in people who lose their temper at traffic jams, unruly children, unresponsive coworkers, and unrealistic bosses. But we may not recognize more subtle manifestations of anger, such as being uncomfortable with loose ends, acting impatiently, or being overly critical. That is anger, too. And, as is so often the case, angry folks don't seem to realize that the behavior causing them problems at home or at work actually stems from unrecognized and unresolved pain and emotional injuries from the past. Is all this negative emotion inevitable, or are there choices about how to respond, choices that can improve personal relationships as well as emotional health? The Anger Trap is a landmark book that strips away the myths and misconceptions about anger and reveals how you can learn to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anger so that you may choose— or help someone else to choose— a better, more spiritually enlightened path. The Anger Trap examines the root causes of anger and can help you realize your patterns and break the destructive cycles of criticism, frustration, and irritation that hurt you and others around you. Drawing insight from timeless spiritual wisdom as well as cutting-edge research, Dr. Carter offers practical techniques to free you from anger, its hidden insecurities, fears, and selfishness and thereby improve the quality of your home and workplace life. The book clearly illustrates how the change process works and The Anger Trap is filled with real-life examples of the ways people have come to terms with their anger by applying the concepts Dr. Carter outlines.

In this practical book, anger experts Drs. Les Carter and Frank Minirth–coauthors of the bestselling The Anger Workbook–show families how the "blame game" (parents blame the kids and kids blame the parents) doesn’t work. Instead they provide insight for dealing with the root causes of anger. In a perfect blend of biblical wisdom and psychological research, they show readers how to understand what can be right about anger, distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anger, recognize how anger can be managed more successfully by controlling desires and insecurities and addressing other underlying issues, and much more. Filled with real-life examples, checklists, evaluation tools, and study questions, this valuable resource for any parent with a preteen or teenager will help parents understand and manage their children’s anger–as well as their own–and show how to create harmony at home.

Don't Let Anxiety Rule Your Life!Worry is one of the most common mood disorders in America. Whether you call it stress, tension, frustration, or anxiety, worry can take its toll on health and well-being. While no one is exempt from the circumstances that cause stress and worry, many of us don't realize how easy it is to become locked into its self-perpetuating cycle...or that they can break free.Do you recognize any of these patterns in your life?You make major efforts to project a correct image of yourself.You have a hard time letting go of frustrations.Fear or distrust causes you to be cautious or calculated.You worry about whether others will accept you.You push yourself to perform appropriately and to make things right.The Worry Workbook identifies these trends and many other manifestations of anxiety, giving you effective strategies to battle such negative tendencies. This powerful twelve-step program presents illuminating questions, insightful guidance, comprehensive checklists, and real-life examples to help you:Learn to distinguish what you can and cannot control, then live accordingly.Recognize the need to "be yourself" and accept yourself for who you are.Communicate effectively rather than hold it all in.Know that each problem has a solution that you can resolve.

Discover Contentment and Peace by Letting Go of Harmful AngerPerhaps there have been times you've felt stuck in bitterness, discouragement or cynicism. Maybe you've asked "How can I forgive when I hurt as badly as I do?" or you've had moments when you thought you'd truly forgiven, only to have anger return. You may have been taught that anger is bad, that Christians can't be angry or that nothing good ever results from anger.From the authors who brought you the bestseller The Anger Workbook, Dr. Les Carter and Frank Minirth of The Minirth Clinic use the same tried and true methods to help you truly forgive those who've wronged you. This 12-part comprehensive plan will teach you how to increase your ability to forgive and find lasting healing by:learning to establish appropriate boundariesachieving a balance between forgiveness and healthy angercorrectly managing and communicating your angerforgiving for the right reasons The workbook format allows you to personalize the information and develop a plan that will lead to real results. This new 12-step plan will guide you through elements that are crucial to forgiveness and healing.The choice is yours: debilitating anger or forgiveness that frees you to expend your energy on emotionally healthy goals and more satisfying pursuits, such as love, respect, confidence, and servitude. Choose forgiveness and start on the path toward a life of abundance.

'I'm always the one willing to go the extra mile for the sake of my marriage', 'His eyes glaze over when I try to talk intimately about things that matter.' Maybe you've heard these words from your spouse. Maybe you've said these words about your marriage. Distant Partner is a book for those who have a relationship with too much busyness and not enough personal sharing. You don't have to stay locked into this merry-go-round battle. Once you understand the dynamics between evasive husbands and emotionally eager wives, you can begin to take the initiative and move forward with healthy actions and choices.

You Don't Have To Let Depression Overtake Your Life.The truth is that depression will seriously afflict one in four of us at some point in our lives. And yet, despite its prevalence, we still cling to many misconceptions about depression and its causes. Depression doesn't always mean an overwhelming sense of gloom; it can also be the underlying cause of feelings like these:"I'm no longer able to sustain my motivation at work.""I view the past with regret or sorrow.""I am often pessimistic. I tend to dwell on what might go wrong.""I'm not sure that people would care if I told them how I feel."To varying degrees, everyone suffers these kinds of feelings. The good news is that depression can be managed. Discover how to identify depression, understand its causes, come to terms with the past and look forward to the future. This 12-part interactive program by Drs. Frank Minirth and Les Carter will help you bring balance to your emotions as you peel back the layers of any situation and develop keys to lasting change.