Scott Tierney

When the conversation begins with the ridicule of Superman's so-called heroism, and ends with innocent toys being thrown into a blender, you know you're in for a riotous good read For the first time, all twelve Pointless Conversations are brought together in one shiny package, along with some of the best 'Quickie' conversations the series has produced. Where does Spiderman keep all that web? What would happen if you swallowed the red and blue pills at once? And what actually occurs when you defecate in a holodeck? All these questions and countless more are answered...or at least rambled about...in Pointless Conversations: The Collection Collection Pointless Conversations: Superheroes- Is Superman a coward, a liar, or a terrorist? Is there also a case for him being a bit... thick?- When Spiderman fires his vast streams of webbing, where does he keep it all? Pointless Conversations: Doctor Emmett Brown- What if the terrorists had shot Doc in the face?- How did Doc and Marty McFly meet? And is their relationship a wee bit... iffy? Pointless Conversations: Lightbulbs & Civilisation- Ionising light bulbs... can they really clean a room with 'awesomeness'?- Cornflakes: more influential than the wheel, more destructive than AIDS? Pointless Conversations: The Expendables- Was the King of England a lion?- What would an Orlando Bloom cake taste like? Pointless Conversations: The Fifth Element- Captain Planet gets taken down a peg - Would Bruce Willis spit in Leeloo's face? Pointless Conversations: The Big One- Why is there a 'P' in pterodactyl?- Would you drink Odo? Pointless Conversations: Are you Going to Heaven?- Would you chop-off your willy if it was a drugged-up killer?- Pedognomes...that's right, PEDOGNOMES Pointless Conversations: The Red Morph or the Blue Morph?- Impromptu impressions of Indiana Jones 4 characters- What happens when you take a poo... IN THE MATRIX? Pointless Conversations: What IS Mr. Bean?- Why do we laugh at a handicapped man pouring boiling water into his mouth? Are we a sick and twisted people?- Alternate opening titles...(for mature/unbalanced readers only) Pointless Conversations: Riker vs Gaston- David and the Goliath...the truth is told - How does a genie have sex? Pointless Conversations: Armageddon- Why a dirty bum is a small price to pay for financial security.- If the Flake is a chocolate bar for women, what's the male equivalent? Pointless Conversations: Killing Buzz and Woody- If you chopped off his head and then threw him is a blender, would Toy Story's Woody, die?- Who wins: Jesus or Chuck Norris? This book contains highly offensive content and is therefore suitable only for a mature audience...

Pointless Conversations: SuperheroesIn the first issue of the comic series all about the pointless, the superhero-themed topics for discussion and/or ridicule are: Is Superman a coward, a liar, or a terrorist? Is there also a case for him being a bit... thick? When Spiderman fires his vast streams of webbing, where does he keep it all? Both have famous dads, but who's harder: Superman or Jesus? And finally... Superdog? Pointless Conversations: Doctor Emmett Brown Back to the Future's Doc Brown... is he the biggest single threat to our galaxy's existence since the big bang? The answer of course is YES GREAT SCOTT, YES Prepare yourself for temporal displacement as well as: What if the terrorists had shot Doc in the face? How did Doc and Marty McFly meet? And is their relationship a wee bit... iffy? What rhymes with Emmett? Is Doc Brown a time travelling psychopath that needs to be stopped at all costs? YES Pointless Conversations: Lightbulbs & Civilisation In the third issue of the comic series all about the pointless, the mismatched and bewildering topics for discussion are: Ionising light bulbs... can they really clean a room with 'awesomeness'? What would you draw with a box of magic pencils? What was the sole reason for social decline? War, drugs, the internet? ...nope. Cornflakes more influential than the wheel, more destructive than AIDS? This book contains highly offensive content and is therefore suitable only for a mature audience...

Never before available in print, contained within are three fantastically pointless conversations from the hand of Scott Tierney. Subjects covered include Star Trek, Bruce Willis, Toy Story and much, much more.

Forced into spending the day with one another while their wife and respective mother undergoes a procedure, a father and son become reacquainted after a period of disjunction. As the day progress and the proverbial scabs are picked, each man comes to understand a little more about the other. And, in the process, a great deal more about themselves...

Another collection of strange conversations about oddly specific subjects from the hand of Scott Tierney. What would an Orlando Bloom cake taste like? Would Bruce Willis spit in Leeloo's face? Who cleans up the Starship Enterprise's Holodeck once you are finished? These and other similarly pressing issues will be rigorously discussed.Pointless Conversations: The Expendables.In the fourth issue of the comic series all about the pointless, it's offbeat film references aplenty, with Robin Hood, The Expendables, and some surreal cake talk (not just any cake talk...SURREAL CAKE TALK ...yeah...). Loud explosions and incoherent old men...a better title for The Expendables? Was the King of England a lion? Maid Marion a child killer?...yes What would an Orlando Bloom cake taste like? * * * Pointless Conversations: The Fifth Element In the fifth issue of the comic series all about the pointless, the film and cartoon related topics for (not very) serious discussion are Batman button mashing, the Queen atop a robotic polar bear, and of course the insanity which is The Fifth Element. Batman button mashing...does every switch in the Batmobile do the same thing? Captain Planet gets taken down a peg The Queen on the back of a robotic polar bear? Would Bruce Willis spit in Leeloo's face? * * * Pointless Conversations: The Big One: It's the question that has dogged scholars for a millennia....what actually happens when you take a poo on the Star Trek Enterprise's holodeck? In the sixth issue of the comic series all about the pointless, it the one that got everyone talking - the Star Trek special : Why is there a 'P' in pterodactyl? Who cleans the Holdeck once you're finished? If you eat holo-food, would you do a holo-poo? Would you drink Odo? *Disclaimer* This issue is rather immature, and if you are easily offended by "rectal forcefields" and "poo quiche" (not to mention an almost infinite number of "poo"s) then this issue isn't really for you...but if you do find these funny, then you are in for a real treat