Bridget Chase

Our two Middle Aged High School Heroes, Gary and Wyatt, set out to Nebraska where the dark dimension of the Upside-Down has leaked into our world due to the hotness of Natalie Portman's lips, which have broken Science and merged the two worlds. Only our Horny Heroes can battle villains and save this land that we call America and call home.

SLIK-SLAK Double Feature That mean two stories, BLAM Passenger Screech: Dustin Diamond is tired of chicks rejecting him because of his past. He and his roommate, Wesley Snipes, decide to take a vacation. Dustin has a change of heart, deciding to embrace the Screech within. This leads Wesley to reconnect with his break out roll as John Cutter, better known as Passenger 57. Screech meets a hot woman on their flight named Natalie, played by the beautiful Alyssa Milano. Dustin tries to score and Wesley sees a building threat on the plane that he must neutralize.Saved by the Quantum Bell: Mr. Belding, played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, enlists Dustin Diamond and Alyssa Milano to help save Bayside High. The worst shit in the universe is coming. Dustin has to revisit his role as Screech and Alyssa becomes Kelly. With Kevin the robot they journey through the 'Pearlescent Colon of the Universe' traversing many parallel universes, with the intent of stopping Pinhead from finishing his sinister plan. Filled with words and endless action shit, lets not spoil everything in this super awesome 4,400 word adventure. If you love Elizabeth Berkley, you've just discovered heave

Grab dat Root Beer Float and take a seat, we got this band of warriors who are fighting off the Undead. Following a terrible battle, and the entire team nearly killed, Maggie and Michonne are left all alone. That was until a new stranger entered the scene, by the name of Casey Jones. Some walks are easy; others super violent, but that's how it goes when you are- The Walking Meh.

This is my last story; love it, or hate it- jk, but felt like dying while writing it.Will is almost dead. He's been walking through the frozen woods for days. An apparition, Jennifer Love Hewitt, begs him to continue to follow. A second visitor, a bear with Tom Hanks Face, shows him a paradise of possibilities. Will has to choose and one of them is certain death.

-A Satire Dark Humor Short Story-Jackie Chan wants to have a love scene in one of his movies. He never, ever gets to have one. Even Steven Seagal has had the honors of acting romantic encounters. Jackie decides to enlist the help of Bridget Chase to transport him to the set of the movie 'Arthur', because as everyone knows, Jackie Chan loves him no one more than that hot actress Jennifer Garner. However upon this Quantum Hollywood leap, Jackie is encountered by a Mandela Effect Traveling Nicholas Cage brandishing a devious mustache. Said Mustached-Star steals Jennifer by way of floating Pirate Ship. Jackie is devastated; so, Bridget decides with the right help they can track her down and retrieve her like all good leading men do. Together the two seek out the Rock-afire Explosion animatronic band. More specifically, the Robot-Dog-Space-Drummer, Dook LaRue whom has Tom Hanks' face CGI-ed onto it. With a mystical drum solo by Tom-Hanks-Dook-LaRue-CGI-Face the two heroes are given the whereabouts of that infinitely hot actress and her current Alias.Will Jackie's good boy antics, the same chivalrous behaviors which has excluded him from sexual encounters in movies, keep him from attaining his sole mission? Or will he make the necessary change to achieve his dreams of sampling those Garner titties?-SAMPLE-I've Got Balls Fer HerJackie Chan was on his computer. He was scrolling through images of Jennifer Garner. "She's so fucking hot Oh baby Look at those titties. I want them titties. Give me them titties. All my Oriental cock wants is some of them titties, please God. She's so hot."...(8*bunny-enter: Bubba LOveSMAsh- They are lick-able. And, her lips-static*44)JJD77 ...zinC- Dr. StaNFAntastiC: Lips fer suckin' some dick (((99)+ add. His Oriental fingers kept flinging-rolling-scrolling through the Google image results. He found one of Jennifer Garner in a bathing suit coming out of the water in a swimming pool. "My God, those titties are hot. I just have to have them. I must have them. I must have them " So, Jackie Chan decided to call the only person he knew who might be able to help."Oh man, I hope he's home. If he's home, then we'll be able to travel through time to the movie. Which movie? Maybe the movie Arthur starring Russell Brand. He's married to Jennifer Garner in the movie so I'm calling. That way, I can bang her in the movie. Hell, maybe I'll get to bang her some off screen in my 'Bang Jennifer' trailer, BOING It's no fair 'ol Jackie never gets to have sex, oh so sexy, sex in his movies. What am I? A boy? A... a, shit I don't know. I'm a man. A man that wants to fuck in my movies "The phone rang. "Hello?""Hey, Bridget Chase," Jackie Chan said. Bridget was at home cuttin' up some salad; some lettuce for a salad. "Hey what's up Jackie Chan? What can I do for you?" "Hey buddy, I got to let you know- I love Jennifer Garner. I must have her, okay? Cool." "I get that. So, what are we going to do?" Bridget asked. -END SAMPLE-

Welcome to the future. Aliens have landed on earth. Their evolution is unstable and rapid. An AI singularity, named Zeroday created by man, has become obsessed with George Clooney. The planet is now at war. The last few members of the military are on a quest to find the only remaining strand of Clooney DNA. The fate of the world rests on the owner of this Hollywood icon's biological code.

A secret government research facility is destroyed. A genetic soldier will be tested. America is awoken from her cryonic sleep. A lunatic has amassed a mutant army to take control of Miami. CIA assassin Firefox enlists the only operative capable of helping her taking apart this villainous gang.Now enter all the action, combat, and sex appeal you can handle. One thing the military knows how to do, is dress their females in barely-there uniforms. Join the in the nonstop violence.

Camelot is under siege by a dark force. King Arthur, to save his majestic kingdom, travels through and inter dimensional wormhole to obtain victory over this evil foe. Our heroic King gets lost and winds up reemerging as a set of hairy balls between a high school girl's legs in present day. The girl, Heather, is now caught in this adventure, and that dark force comes after her, too. Even worse, how is she suppose to explain the hairy balls with Arthur's face to the hunky new boy that she met? The two unlikely partners must work together to save Camelot, vanquish evil, and get Heather back to her usual girl fix'ins. A ridiculously silly, over the top time travel story that bends history into an origami swan and then throws it in the toilet.

A little mix of I Know What You Did Last Summer, Mortal Kombat and King Kong. When a mysterious serial killer takes the lives of a few of Kong's friends, this ape follows the killer to a tropical island where the residents participate in a series of brutal death matches. Mourning the loss of the beautiful Sarah Michelle Gellar, Kong is determined to find justice. Unfortunately even his girlfriend Anne Hathaway finds herself mixed up in this mess. Will King Kong be the ultimate Kung Fu champion? Find out inside

Igger Series Book 1*Adult content, language, situations, actions*His name is Igger, the baddest motha#$ &#$a' on the force. But tonight, he is an undercover brotha'.Summary: A new drug has hit the streets. 'The Nutty Professor' is a toxic chemical narcotic and is destroying the youth of New York. Igger is the police officer 'n' charge of finding the source. He sets out on a drug bust to climb the ladder of distribution. The only thing sweeter than stoppin' this drug, is smashin' heads and poudin' a$$ along the way. This is Igger's city, 'n' it's his duty to clean up.

An off-shore mining compound is under siege by... take a guess. Yep, robotic sharks Miller is an old fart; the compound explodes and he has to fine a way out. Cal is a scientist on his way to the compound in a underwater monorail. Obviously, shit goes bad. There are two female characters, Liz and Unknown Bikini Girl 1. Heather, plays Unknown Bikini Girl 1, and hopes that the role in the movie 'Robotic Sharks' will re-ignite her career. Liz is hot as f%$# and basically like everyone else in the story, fights for her life.

Adult Content, Language, and Situations*SummaryIn this second installment, a New York Police Officer known as Igger, heads to Japan to find the Drug Lord behind the new chemical nightmare called 'The Nutty Professor'. In a land of foreign customs, Igger needs a little help from the unlikely partner Akihiko, a young Asian boy. Igger and this little Stir Fry, embark on some detective work in the heart of Tokyo. Unfortunately, the Drug Lord knows of Igger's arrival and everything goes sideways. Looks like Igger's gonna' need some extra bullets.

Well, like most stories; this one starts at the beginning. Jessica Biel is kidnapped. Van Damme's granny, Granny Damme, can't stand by while such a sweet girl is in the hands of a madman; and this madman happens to be Steven Seagal, who is the worst kind of madman. Justin Timberlake teams up with Granny Damme, and her cat Kurt Wussels to find Jessica and free her. Steven has other hostages, who he plans to kill while vacationing aboard a cruise ship. Oh, and he loves raptors. I can't tell you what happens; but yeah, that is like a mini spoiler or something.So read or don't; laugh or don't; be happy or don't.I got more shit to write; see ya

*This short story is not for children. It is absurd and ridiculous*The Sesame Street Family takes off, for the first time, and journeys to the outside world. They stop and stay at a Farm House Air BNB. The neighbors are a crazed murderous outcast family. Enter Leatherface and Sunday Morning Muppet Splatter Punk Shee-it These puppets were made for the teeth of a chainsaw.

*Adult language, actions, and content- short story*-variant cover-Summary: After Stephanie is taken by a cult member of The Primordial Haven, the Full House Family comes to her rescue. The Devil may have some bent demons, but fucking family is more bad ass than Russel Crow in Gladiator. Yeah Bitches Here comes the Tanner Family

Sylvester Stallone finds himself burdened by the task of writing the screenplay, 'Stayin' Alive'. A dark figure appears that claims to be able to help him create a masterpiece. Sly questions his sanity, but something larger seems to be invested in the future of the movie.John Travolta, while waiting for the script to be finished, becomes infatuated with a women from his dreams. Every night while he sleeps, he sees her at a train station, but is unable to get close to her. During the day, to combat the growing heart ache, John loses himself to the pleasures of a Virtual Reality world. Yvonne Strahovski works as an actress. 'Neural Recorder's have left her feeling empty in her work. Worse off, she nightly dreams about a man at a train station that she can never quite reach.'Stayin' Alive' premiered at American Theaters in 1983, but the real story behind its creation is 'one' hidden in the Hollywood shadows.